Breaking the Cycle of Stress: The Hidden Toll of Masking at Work
Recently, I had a conversation with a university student about the stress she was experiencing in her part-time job. She has ADHD and is wonderfully bubbly, full of ideas, and genuinely enthusiastic about her work.
However, like many others with ADHD, she struggles with time management and staying focused. As we spoke, it became clear that her workplace was focusing too much on her mistakes, which was adding to her stress and taking a toll on her wellbeing.
She also shared that, at work, she was “masking.” For those who may not know, masking is when neurodiverse individuals feel the need to hide their natural tendencies to fit societal norms or workplace expectations. Research consistently shows that masking is highly stressful and can negatively impact a person’s health and wellbeing.
For this student, the pressure to conform to her manager’s expectations was exhausting. She described how draining it was to constantly suppress her true self, which affected her energy levels, wellbeing, and even her productivity.
The effects were far-reaching. She felt constantly on edge, unfulfilled, and dreaded going to work. Sleep became an issue—she lay awake at night worrying. Physically, she experienced skin flare-ups, headaches, and even resorted to biting her lip from stress. Eventually, she reached a breaking point and decided to leave the job.
Thankfully, her story took a positive turn. She found a new position with a manager who was more understanding and supportive. What a difference it made! In this new role, she could bring her authentic self to work. She was free to share her ideas and energy, which not only benefited her but also her employer and team. If she was running late or found herself off-task, a gentle reminder from her manager was far more effective than criticism. The change was transformative.
What struck me most about her story was how these adjustments—creating a supportive environment and focusing on strengths rather than struggles—came at no extra cost. They simply required an understanding manager who valued her for what she brought to the table, whilst supporting with the difficulties.
This story highlights an important takeaway: when neurodiverse individuals are allowed to be themselves, they thrive. By fostering supportive environments and recognizing strengths, we can improve not only wellbeing but also productivity and team cohesion. Everyone benefits.
If you would like some support to support your neurodiverse employees, please contact us for a no-obligation conversation around how we can help
